'Work'ing it out! - A Guide For Working Couples (Part I Contd)

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Share thoughts and emotions

Sharing thoughts, feelings and needs is the best way to become emotionally close to someone. Leave a love note in his wallet / purse or in the wardrobe to kick start your day. Don't hesitate in speaking your heart and convey thoughts that are in the deep recesses of your mind. Says Manoj Pandey, a software engineer, "I need to talk to my wife always. Be it about an offer, which has come to me or any small thing, I always call my wife. She is a banker and I value her opinion. Sharing important or insignificant details of your life help bring you closer to each other."

Take a vacation

Whenever you feel that you're over stressed or don't have the time to talk to your spouse, it's best to take a break. You can take a weekend off from work and rush to a nearby place. Says celebrity Shefali Zariwala (married to singer Harmeet Gulzar), "As our work is such we both do spend a lot of time together. But when we are away on tours for a month or so, that's the time the stress starts building up. So, we have one basic rule to ease this out. We take off on a vacation to a nearby place. And our best getaway is Madh Island, which is very close to Mumbai. The moment we step into the hotel, we switch off our cell phones and just spend two days of bliss."

Quality not quantity

Geetika Baluni (married to a naval officer, Lt Cdr Ashish), a teacher, firmly believes, "It's not about how many hours you are with your husband, it's about how much you talk and interact. It's the quality of time spent that's important. And you don't need to be physically there to talk. Me and my husband talk a lot on the phone as well."

Without quality time, your relationship will not survive. Set aside at least half an hour daily to spend time with each other. You could get away from home for a relaxed after-dinner walk. And at least once a month spend time exclusively with each other. Set up a dinner date and enjoy each other.

Prioritize

It's an old theory, which really works wonders! Chalk out a list of tasks that have to be performed for the day. Prioritize what's urgent and what's not. Set an alarm on your mobile phone to remind you to give him / her a call. "I always make it a point to call and talk to my husband, be it just for a few seconds and find out what he's doing. Also, we plan our Sundays together and chalk out things that we can do together on a Sunday or a holiday. It's also important to make sure that at least once a week, perhaps during dinner, you talk about what really matters, it can be about your job, about your house, anything which you both need to discuss," says Priya Kohli, a call center executive married to Tapan, a hotelier.