Exclusive: How Mental Coaches Help Athletes Deal With Disappointment, Failure And Turn Setbacks Into Comebacks

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In the world of sports, the roar of the crowd and the thrill of victory often overshadow the quiet battles athletes face off the field. Behind the scenes, mental coaches work tirelessly to guide athletes through their darkest moments-those times when the scoreboard reflects disappointment, and the path to success seems shrouded in shadows.

Well, India's leading sports psychologists may differ slightly in their respective approaches when it comes to dealing with mental health, but if there is one aspect they all agree on, it is that sportsmen and women need to understand the difference between failing and deeming themselves failures.

(Left to right): Varadayini Gorhe, Paddy Upton, and Amit Gadkari

Through a blend of psychological strategies, emotional support, and resilience training, mental coaches equip athletes with the tools to not only cope with setbacks but to harness them as catalysts for unprecedented comebacks.

According to figures released by the World Health Organisation (WHO) in July, 60 to 70 million people in India suffer from common and severe mental disorders. However, numerous hurdles are standing in the way of addressing the situation.

For one, the ratio of psychiatrists (0.3), psychologists (0.07) and social workers (0.07) per 100 000 people pales in comparison to the ratio of psychiatrists in developed countries (6.6 per 100 000). For another, financial barriers prevent tens of millions of people from seeking treatment. But one of the biggest obstacles is the stigmatisation of those battling mental disorders.

Seperating "Who I am" From "what I do"

Paddy Upton, known as one of the world's best mental coaches for the impact he has made on the Indian cricket and hockey teams, Indian Premier League franchises and sides playing in Australia's Big Bash League, as well as Amit Gadkari (the founder and director of Nudge Sports) and sports psychologist at Nudge sports, Varadayini Gorhe; all make this a focal point of their work with athletes.

"When athletes identify themselves with poor results, they can view themselves as failures. This can be a dangerous situation to be in," says Upton, whose mental guidance helped the Indian men's hockey team win the bronze medal at the recent Paris Olympics.

"The key is to understand that sport is a failure game for most athletes. Even the great Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps probably lost more races than he won. One of the most powerful sayings I keep coming back to is from American psychiatrist M. Scott Peck, who said life is difficult, and when you fully accept that life is difficult, it is no longer difficult. It is the same in sport. You make mistakes; you get injured. It happens."

Mental coaches devote much of their time to reinforcing the separation of "who I am" from "what I do".

Gadkari points out that professional athletes feel far more pressure when they fail, given that their performance is scrutinised by millions of people watching television or commenting on social media.

However, a 16-year-old playing goalkeeper for her local football team feels the same mental impact if she fails to save shots on goal. This, he says, is why sports psychologists need to play a role at all levels of sport.

Failure Mindset Can Let To Health Issues

Upton has seen first-hand the effects of athletes falling into a failure mindset. It can often manifest as depression, which leads to behaviours they believe will distract them from feeling low.

"That's where we see excessive alcohol use, drug use, gambling or even various forms of sex addiction, including porn abuse and being with prostitutes. But they don't want to do these things in the public eye. They don't want people to see that they feel depressed. These distractions see them feel even worse about themselves, and it becomes a deep, dark spiral. It happens a lot more than the public sees."

Gorhe, who has worked with several IPL players, says self-perceptions of failure can manifest physically through psychosomatic conditions and muscle tension. She agrees with Upton that behavioural changes are a big indicator that intervention is needed.

How To Handle Failures, Stressful Situations

Players might start venting their anger by lashing out at those around them. This stems from what psychologists call "learned helplessness," a mental state in which people believe they do not have what it takes to succeed.

For Upton, several key criteria need to be met when helping an athlete discern between success and failure.
The first is to acknowledge the individual's naturally occurring mental state and emotions. They should be made to feel completely at ease in expressing these fully and in a healthy way.

The second step is to emphasise the perspective that failing is inevitable, and that the important people in their lives will still love them regardless.

"There have been times when a young cricketer has failed to score a run. A bit later, I walk up to them, put out my hand for them to shake, smile, laugh, and say, 'Welcome to the game of cricket'. They normally laugh at that," Upton says.

The next part of the process is to ask athletes what they would do differently if faced with the same situation that led them to underperform. From there, a solution is formulated.

The final stage is celebrating the fact that the failure has taught them a valuable lesson.

Gorhe agrees and believes it is vital that coaches and support staff understand the multiple parameters involved in helping players overcome failure and disappointment on the field.

"When we work with high-performance academies, we insist on working with coaches to make them aware of how these situations should handled."

Disclaimer: The information provided in this article is for general informational and educational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or a qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.